My Twitter timeline was flooded with this hashtag this past weekend after that terrible incident in California. AFter reading various articles about the incident and a summary of his video (I refused to watch it) it seemed to me like it was one big blame game. The murderer (and I’m referring to him as that because his intent was to kill the people that he killed) was blaming his actions on not receiving the attention from women that he expected, and his parents were blaming his actions on Asperger Syndrome.
It seems to me like another case of entitlement. It’s really sad that we as women are taught ways to avoid being sexually assaulted. We get handgun licenses, mace, take self-defense classes, carry rape whistles, shoot there are even condoms designed especially to prevent rape but what’s not being done is the thing that should be. More men need to be taught not to rape.
Period.
I, as a woman, was not put on this earth to be your eye candy. I shouldn’t have to pretend to have a lesbian lover at a bar to thwart unwanted advances. My attire should not argued as the cause of a sexual assault. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard “look at the short skirt/crop top/red lipstick/high heels she had on, she was asking for it”. No, unless she consented she wasn’t asking for it. No means no.
Catcalling is not cute, nor flattering. Don’t try to grab my hand if I don’t know you like that. Don’t call me “honey”, “baby”, or any other pet names like that if I don’t know you. If I say “no” then I mean “no”. Period. That doesn’t mean buy me a drink and I’ll change my mind, that doesn’t mean show me something flashy and I’ll change my mind. It means no!
Don’t get me wrong, I think that women should still take the precautions but I hope that one day we can work towards not having to do so.
Did you guys hear about this? If so, feel free to leave a comment below with your thoughts.
Totally agree with you. Men need to go back to being taught how to be gentlemen. The things they get away with are disgraceful.